LookOut Wales | Hugh Pugh reports from Fishguard starring John Sparkes
 
Hugh Pugh

LookOut Wales | Hugh Pugh reporting from Fishguard

Hugh Pugh is a news reporter for the fictitious LookOut Wales on HTV Wales which was featured on the award winning comedy sketch show Barry Welsh is Coming, starring John Sparkes as Hugh Pugh

In a country where two languages are spoken there should be two ways of seeing things

This is the collection of news reports, random tweets and special features

 Mayor of Fishguard, Mr Kenny Twat

Kennt Twat

Mayor of Fishguard Kenny Twat has announced new austerity cuts. In order to save money the swimming baths will be closing lanes 4 and 7

While there might be compelling economic reasons to merge the towns of Fishguard and Haverfordwest, there is another view; it's stupid

Mayor of Fishguard Kenny Twat said that the consolidation of Welsh councils didn't go far enough and there should only be one; Fishguard



 The latest in Science and Technology from Fishguard College of Technology

Fishguard

Scientists at Fishguard College of technology have made an application for people who swallow their iPhones; “There’s a crapp for that”

Astronomers at Fishguard College of technology have measured the distances between galaxies in the universe to an accuracy of just 37 inches

According to leading clever clogs at the Fishguard College of Technology; 'Humans have stopped evolving' this is wholly evident in Rhyl


 A look back at yesterday in Fishguard

Fishguard

There was pandemonium in Fishguard today when time started to go backwards.
But everything returned to normal when scientists from Fishguard College of Technology traced the problem to a fault in the town hall clock.

Fishguard is going to be the first place in Wales to show XXX rated porno films. The two films, 'I'm a nymphomaniac from Neath' and 'Fill My Rhyll' will be screened at local cinema the Fishguard Odeous.

The cinema's proprietor, Mr. J Y Kelly, said that they were the filthiest films ever made and he was delighted to be showing them at his cinema. The XXX rating means that no one at all will be allowed to see the films.


 Fishguard FC Rovers in another controversial match

Fishguard

Fishguard FC Rovers had another controversial match today when scuffles broke out between the team and the Police on the touchline

There was a fire at Fishguard FC Rovers ground today and manager Nobby Bobby saved the cups as he got to the team canteen just in time

After a poor start to the season at Fishguard FC Rovers manager Nobby Bobby was caught speeding on the a487. He’ll do anything for 3 points

 


 Fishguard Jazz Festival

Image from Fishguard

It’s a fact that a jazz guitarist and a blind javelin thrower are alike as they command instant attention as everyone moves out of range

The Fishguard Jazz Festival will have intermissions limited to 15 minutes so the organisers don’t have to retrain any of the musicians

The Jazz Festival this August brings many famous musicians to Fishguard and a good thing to. We don't want them wandering around Brecon

Local Fishguard gardener Aneurin Anus says that for the Jazz Festival he'll be getting his horn out and playing with it on the street

Jazz is a popular alternative to mass produced synthesised pop music, whereas at the Fishguard Jazz Festival it will be made up on the day



 And finally....

Hugh Pugh

A new shop has opened in Fishguard on the High Street for bespoke footwear repair; "Cobblers" is exactly what it says on the sign

Children from Haddock Street Junior School had their sports day today with Ben Dover winning the 100 meters pointing at odd things race

Vandalism and Police Sergeant Norman Helmet said its getting worse in Fishguard. Last week graffiti was found on the road saying “Bus Stop”

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Hugh Pugh © John Sparkes | Images © ITV Cymru Wales | Updated 23 December 2016 (Original content from 2003 & 2004 | Tweets from 2009-2017) No infringement of copyright is intended. This is a unofficial celebration, non-commercial, non-profit making, fan site